Is your relationship affected by ENC? Take the questionnaire below.

 

In your relationship is there:

- a feeling like something is wrong or missing, but you don't know what?

- a feeling like you can't get through to your spouse's feelings, or rarely hear your spouse's feelings?

Conflict avoidance

- an avoidance in bringing up potentially upsetting topics or issues and instead they are swept under the rug?

- one or both spouses use the "silent treatment" when unhappy or upset? 

- retreating, shutting down or walking away from a disagreement or discussion?

- self-blame, defensiveness and excuse-making when their spouse expressed feelings to them?

Lack of deep and meaningful conversation

- mainly talk about "surface topics" or "details" while intimate conversations about emotions and feelings are absent? 

- discussions about important matters often end in frustration and are left unresolved?

- one or both spouses have a limited vocabulary of emotion words?

Emotional intimacy is lacking

- a discomfort in showing emotion in front of the other?

- awkwardness or discomfort in being together with no other distractions?

- "Mind reading" Instead of asking questions, your spouse often misinterprets what you mean or incorrectly predicts what you will do?  Leaving the feeling that your spouse doesn't know or understand you.

- your spouse often assumes that other people (including you) think negatively about them?

- when your spouse is feeling sad, angry, upset or overwhelmed the reason is not expressed to you?

- one spouse claims to be perfectly happy, even while the other expresses deep dissatisfaction in the marriage? (this highlights emotional disconnection)

Passion decreases over time

- very little arguments or disagreements take place in the marriage?

- lack of physical affection, or low desire for physical intimacy?

- low desire or need to see each other?

Emotional blow-ups

- If only one spouse in the marriage has ENC, the spouse without ENC may have emotional "blow-ups" or outbursts from releasing pent up, stored emotions that haven't been expressed properly or validated by their ENC spouse.

The questions which have a "YES" answer show in which areas your marriage is being affected by ENC from you, your spouse or both.  

Overcoming ENC in a marriage needs supportive guidance, without which, the road to recovery can be very confusing, frustrating, painful and unsuccessful. 

Encountering these destructive behaviors in a relationship can be silently harmful to emotional health and physical health so please reach out to us. We do not diagnose or treat any specific condition.  Our 5 step recovery & healing program is effective in helping people with CPTSD, Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), Histrionic, Emotional Neglect from Childhood (ENC).  We also help individuals who are connected to people who are suffering with these conditions as well as Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). 

Get help for yourself, so you can help your relationships.

© 2020 by Joshua Goldberg